Thursday, March 22, 2012


What is love?  I used to think it was when you put someone else’s happiness above your own, but now I realize that’s just the sign of an unhealthy, one-sided relationship.  Lately I’ve been thinking that love is when another person’s happiness becomes your happiness too.

For example, I didn’t want to drive an hour away to attend the funeral of someone I only met once, but when I saw how happy my mother-in-law was to have the ride and the companionship, I was happy to have been able to do it. I didn’t want to get up extra early this morning so I could take my daughter to the orthodontist before school, but anticipating her relief at being rid of the poking wire, I didn’t mind a bit.

I think another way to know if you love someone is by their annoying habits.  When his idiosyncrasies make you smile and shake your head rather than resist (or not) the urge to bludgeon him with the heaviest thing you can get your hands on, chances are you love him.

What is intimacy? To me, intimacy is trusting someone with your vulnerabilities. Whether it be embarrassing and personal secrets or embarrassing and personal body parts—when you share that with someone and you don’t regret it afterward, that’s intimacy.  

Nicki Elson

Thank you, Nicki! My friends, please be sure to give Nicki some bloggy love in your comments. You're great, Veb!


  1. I agree with the annoying habits comment for sure. I went back and looked through a bunch of these intimacy posts (and other posts in general, I've been off Blogger for quite a while) and I like this segment, it's interesting to get other's opinions. They all seem to have some truth/ something relatable in them.

  2. I like this. Very much agreed on the whole their happiness is your happiness concept.

    Not entirely sure about the annoying habits part. I'm pretty sure my annoying habits still make my wife want to bludgeon me. Should I be worried? :)

  3. Hmmm... I guess. At this moment I am not sure what either means:) This is a result of a bad day.

  4. The simplicity of your answer speaks volumes! I completely agree and now want to hug my husband who I've managed to not bludgeon on multiple occasions! ;)

  5. Right on! You tell it like it is.....

  6. I agree. It follows along with that post I wrote where I said if each person gives a 100 percent of themselves to make the other one happy how can that relationship fail? Bravo Jane.

  7. Love is when I get my satisfaction.

  8. Well look at all these lovely comments. :) Glad some of you have been able to connect w/ certain aspects of my answers. Simple is the only way I do things, Princess. Rick - you might want to start wearing protective head gear around the house, just saying.

    Thanks for having me over here, Skankybug! I haven't gotten a post up at my place yet this week, but I shall do so before the sun sets.

  9. Skankybug? Why, I don't what you mean by that, Vebbie. Thanks for participating in the series.

  10. I consider it a gift that my wife of 38 years can't crank my chainsaw :)

  11. I love this--such a neat take on things :0)

  12. Simple, yet direct and to the point.

    I too, have spent my entire day off doing for others today. Doing things that I really didn't feel like doing, but know that that would make them happy. And that, is love. :)


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