Friday, January 8, 2021

LET'S BEGIN WITHOUT TOO MANY DETAILS

 Gentle Readers . . . and Maxwell,

I want to tell you what has happened, but I'm going to begin with a little information and see what I'm able to say in the future. A psychologist friend has told me to talk and write about what happened. Get it out; don't internalize it. It wasn't my fault.

Late Sunday Afternoon, January 3, 2021:  An attack in my home. Strangulation. Started with me standing up, but suddenly, I was on the floor, still being strangled. It was incredibly painful. I thought I would die. Screamed. Shouted for help. Hit him in the balls and bit his hand. Finally convinced the attacker to let me go and I would not call the police. As soon as I could, I got out the front door and screamed for help as I ran first to one neighbor's house (not home but saw me on camera and returned to try to help) and then ran to another house where a couple took me in and called the police.

Went to a hospital ER in an ambulance. Attacker arrested. 

Sunday night: In ER. Never saw a doctor. Physician's assistant and nurse made it clear that I was a bother. I know these are COVID times, but I needed help. I did get x-rays and a scan. Jaw broken. Covered in bruises. Terrified. Discharged. The nurse said they didn't have time to find someone to take me home. They couldn't get a ride service because I didn't have a credit card. Excuse me all to hell for not grabbing my phone and my wallet while I was being strangled. 

Went out into the dark. No shoes. Wearing torn pajamas. Tried to walk home and knew I wouldn't make it. Stopped at a house and asked people to call the police because I needed help. They said they called, but the police never came. I don't think they called. They did nothing to help me.

Continued walking. Saw a man in the street behind a car. Begged him to call the police. He stood and stared at me so menacingly that I continued my journey. Went to another house. Asked a woman to call the police because I had been attacked and discharged from the ER with no way to get home. She said, Call the police and tell them what?

I kept walking. Two cop cars passed. I flagged them down. The woman had called! After verifying the case number I had been given by an officer in the hospital, an officer drove me home. I thanked him profusely. 

The attack started at approximately 5:15 p.m. I noted the time when I arrived: 11:38 p.m. 

Had pain pills, but on Wednesday, I noticed something new: pain in my left shoulder and under my left arm. I rested and medicated. Iced. Thursday morning the pain was worse, and after a while, began to radiate down my left arm. I called Carol and asked her to come over immediately. I prepared by putting needed items in my bag. When she arrived, I said, Let's stay calm. We're going for a ride to the emergency room because I might be having a heart attack.

We did NOT go to the same emergency room.

While we were driving, the pain in my arm became worse. The fingers on my left hand were numb. Carol let me out at the ER and I told the triage nurse about my symptoms. She got a wheelchair and said, I'm going to call this as a possible stroke.

A doctor greeted me and decided it wasn't a stroke after he asked me to push on his hands and I nearly knocked him down. Tests determined I did not have a heart attack. Dr. said I was having muscle spasms that caused the pain and prescribed muscle relaxers. Everyone treated me with such kindness.

Carol took me home. She and the very nice lady who lives across the street have gotten me groceries and picked up prescriptions. The muscle relaxers are helping more than the painkillers did.

I fear the future. The attacker is charged with a felony. I doubt if he'll get much jail/prison time. I'll get a restraining order. It won't stop him. Hospital bills will pour in. Insurance only covers so much. I fear being ruined financially. I fear being murdered. 

That's as much as I feel up to writing for now.


Infinities of love,

Janie Junebug

60 comments:

  1. Oh my God Janie I am so, so,so sorry! can't imagine what you're going through. Please do anything and everything necessary to stay safe. Please, please keep us updated and let us know you're okay!

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  2. Wha?!?!?!??! How awful for you! Please keep us posted ~

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  3. Oh Janie, there are no words for me to say. I am shocked snd horrified for you.To say I am sorry is such an understatement. Stay safe and do whatever you have to do to stay safe. I am with Jennifer. Please keep us updated. I know I am far away but is there anything I can do for you?

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    1. Thank you, Anne. Everyone who responds does something for me by showing me love.

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  4. Janie... I am shocked What The Hell Happened. I am so sorry.
    He is he only being charged with a FELONY HE TRIED TO KILL YOU !
    Can someone stay with you ? or for a few days you stay with them, are the dogs ok? don't worry about the bills just say you will SUE the Hospital, and everyone that is always a good stalling move. Call the newspaper. Your Congressman.
    Please take care of yourself. I wish I lived closer.
    This is so wrong.

    Hugs gayle

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  5. Janie. How did you keep this in. Im in shock and tears. I don't have words but wish I could give you a big huge hug. Guess hospital are inundated with covid? You have all my good vibes and peace to you. You have np idea the hug I want to give you.

    Xoxoxoxo

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    1. Oh.....start one of those go funds me accounts. I ain't working right now....but would be more then happy to donate to you my friend.

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    2. Excellent idea! I would donate as well.

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    3. I also thought of a go fund me good advice Mistress Maddie

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    4. Me too! My god what is this world coming to. Hang in there and know that all these "strangers" out here are thinking of you and sending you hugs and light.

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  6. I really don't have the words. I am so sorry, but that isn't enough. Someone mentioned a go fund me page. If you do set one up I will happily contribute. And parsnips suggestions are excellent.

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  7. Oh Janie, how terrifying! And shame on that first hospital. 😠 Hopefully, you have someone who can stay with you while you heal. And yes, don't worry about the bills right now (great idea about the Go Fund Me page, though). I'm so sorry this happened to you! 😢

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    1. Yes, shame on the people working at that hospital and shame on other people who didn't help.

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  8. What the hell!!!????
    I am trying to process this.
    What did they say to do about your broken jaw?!
    Wandering the streets in torn pajamas!
    OMG! I am sooo sorry this happened to you!
    Please keep us informed when you can.
    love and hugs...and attempted murder is a felony.

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    1. Yes, it is a felony. Currently the charge says minor/no injury, but I will correct that with the state attorney's office.

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  9. Oh, Janie, how awful. I'm so glad you were finally able to find some kindness and good care. My heart is with you. I'm sending you gentle hugs.

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  10. Hi Janie - sounds too horrible for words. I hope you can recover and find some peace - thank goodness for Carol ... but the whole episode sounds soul destroying ... I can only send lots of healing thoughts - Hilary

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  11. Oh, Janie ... I'm so sorry. This is really bad. I'm glad you got better help from the second ER. How horrible to go through this. Can someone stay with you for a bit? Can you go public in the local newspaper about your treatment at the first ER? Often that seems to be what it takes when this kind of treatment happens. Please gather in all the support you can from family and friends and neighbours. Those who love you will be glad of a chance to help. We are your online friends and will be here to listen and help however we can. Huge hugs, my dear friend.

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    1. I might call the newspaper. When I was a reporter, I would have been happy to take on this kind of story.

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  12. Holy crap, Janie! What a horrible ordeal! Wishing you all the best in both your physical and emotional recovery. Is your jaw wired shut now?

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    1. Not wired. I read online that the severity of the break determines whether the jaw should be wired shut. I hope it can heal without surgery.

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  13. This is horrible. The attack was atrocious, but so was the lack of concern by others who should be helping. May you find peace and recover, soon.

    https://fromarockhillside.com

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    1. The first house where I stopped was a beautiful place with lovely Christmas decorations. That's why I went there. I thought they would help.

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  14. Janie, WHAT THE HELL?!?! This is insane! Is there a victim's advocacy service you can call, through the police department or the local DA? A social worker? At the very least you need to talk to someone about what you've experienced. I can't believe you were treated the way you were at the first hospital and then discharged into the street. Like Jenny-O, I wonder if that story needs to be told publicly somehow.

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    1. I'm going to start making phone calls to look for help.

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    2. I was thinking the same thing; victims assistance / advocacy. There are crime victim funds available that you can easily qualify for that will assist with medical bills, therapy, etc.

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  15. Ok I read this and my heart was racing and my body shaking terribly my shaking gets worse when I am upset. All I could think as I read was no no no then what the bloody hell when I read about how the hospital treated you, that was so bloody wrong how could they just not help you find a way home. I feel disgusted about the way you have been treated.

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    1. Jo-Anne, you are disgusted because you have a kind heart.

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  16. This is past terrible. First, work on recovering. Are you secure? Doors locked, and windows. I am reading lots of good advice. You should take it.

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    1. I think I'm on the way to recovering physically. The pain isn't as bad today. I have a security system and I turn it on. I'm going to upgrade it.

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  17. Nope. None of this. Where to begin? What to type? I am going to stick with worrying about you, and am sorry you surely can't separate it out like that. Let your body heal and hopefully your mind starts to follow when it can. Lean on those who can help you

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  18. He. Broke. Your JAW???

    Jesus.

    Is there anyone who can stay with you a bit? Help you install a ring or camera system just in case? (We just got one for the exterior for $40, super easy to set up..) I know what it's like to be afraid in your own home. There are no words to make it better right now.

    Take all the "help" you can get, let people check in on you. And stay away from the pain pills if you can. I always did better on muscle relaxers and the heating pad. I'm serious old school though. I tend to do better if I can still feel a bit of the pain so I don't overdo and hurt myself worse. Plus you'll need your wits about you, just in case.

    Money, I've found, works itself out. Worrying about it is like praying for it to take over. Medical bills can be paid at $5 a month, no interest. Love from Boston.

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    1. Oh, yeah. Broken jaw. I definitely feel better without the pain pills.

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  19. Oh my gosh, Janie! I am so sorry for all that you went through and all still dealing with. I can't even begin to imagine how you must be feeling. There are a lot of good ideas in these comments and I encourage you to gather all the resources and support you can. The go fund me page is a wonderful idea. Reach out for the help. And reach out to us. We are here for you. Make sure to secure your home. Lots of hugs. xo

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    1. I am getting ideas from the comments, Martha. All of you are helping me.

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  20. I am so sorry, Janie, for what you went through. I echo everyone else's good advice given here. Thank heavens for the kindness that was shown to you. That first hospital needs to be held to account in some way. Get yourself settled; do whatever you need to make yourself feel safer in your home. Hugs from Ohio!

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  21. Shocking.
    I gather you know the attacker? I hope you can move in with (or have others move to you) so you are not alone for a while. That can go a long way to stabilizing a rough situation.
    I'm so so so sorry

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    1. Yes, I know the attacker. I don't hate him, but he needs to go to prison.

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    2. I suspected that it is somebody you know / are related to (I worked with victims thru a local non profit) - but regardless, prison is the appropriate result of your attack for your attacker! Because it could and can escalate. Take care of YOU.

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  22. Oh, Janie. I am so sorry. This shouldn't happen to anyone. Can anyone stay with you or can you stay with anyone? How frightening, demoralizing and heartbreaking.

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    1. Frightening, demoralizing, and heartbreaking are the correct words.

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  23. I am just now hearing about this - I am so pissed this happened to you. Scary and to think you're not even safe in your own home. I sure hope you can heal physically and emotionally. That might take some time and its good you have someone to talk to.

    God Bless you and I will put you on my prayer list.

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  24. I'm just learning this now. Holy Toledo. Janie! I had no idea as I read through your future, cheerful posts. I can't even imagine. The thought of being strangled is terrifying. Good on you for hitting and biting the bastard!!! Your quick thinking likely saved your life. Lots of caring people have given you some good ideas to follow up on! Please, please let us know how you're doing.

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    1. I feel down at times, but writing about what happened has helped me a lot. My words helped to stop him more than the hitting and biting.

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  25. Gods, Janie! I am so sorry and it is most definitely not your fault. Fuck! Can't favorite young man come live with you? I hope your attacker rots in hell.

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    1. I am so sorry and upset that this happened to you. You most definitely don't deserve any of this. And I hate that you're in pain and terrified. But I hope you can find a way to feel safe again. Sending you huge hugs.

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