Gentle Readers . . . and Maxwell,
I want to tell you what has happened, but I'm going to begin with a little information and see what I'm able to say in the future. A psychologist friend has told me to talk and write about what happened. Get it out; don't internalize it. It wasn't my fault.
Late Sunday Afternoon, January 3, 2021: An attack in my home. Strangulation. Started with me standing up, but suddenly, I was on the floor, still being strangled. It was incredibly painful. I thought I would die. Screamed. Shouted for help. Hit him in the balls and bit his hand. Finally convinced the attacker to let me go and I would not call the police. As soon as I could, I got out the front door and screamed for help as I ran first to one neighbor's house (not home but saw me on camera and returned to try to help) and then ran to another house where a couple took me in and called the police.
Went to a hospital ER in an ambulance. Attacker arrested.
Sunday night: In ER. Never saw a doctor. Physician's assistant and nurse made it clear that I was a bother. I know these are COVID times, but I needed help. I did get x-rays and a scan. Jaw broken. Covered in bruises. Terrified. Discharged. The nurse said they didn't have time to find someone to take me home. They couldn't get a ride service because I didn't have a credit card. Excuse me all to hell for not grabbing my phone and my wallet while I was being strangled.
Went out into the dark. No shoes. Wearing torn pajamas. Tried to walk home and knew I wouldn't make it. Stopped at a house and asked people to call the police because I needed help. They said they called, but the police never came. I don't think they called. They did nothing to help me.
Continued walking. Saw a man in the street behind a car. Begged him to call the police. He stood and stared at me so menacingly that I continued my journey. Went to another house. Asked a woman to call the police because I had been attacked and discharged from the ER with no way to get home. She said, Call the police and tell them what?
I kept walking. Two cop cars passed. I flagged them down. The woman had called! After verifying the case number I had been given by an officer in the hospital, an officer drove me home. I thanked him profusely.
The attack started at approximately 5:15 p.m. I noted the time when I arrived: 11:38 p.m.
Had pain pills, but on Wednesday, I noticed something new: pain in my left shoulder and under my left arm. I rested and medicated. Iced. Thursday morning the pain was worse, and after a while, began to radiate down my left arm. I called Carol and asked her to come over immediately. I prepared by putting needed items in my bag. When she arrived, I said, Let's stay calm. We're going for a ride to the emergency room because I might be having a heart attack.
We did NOT go to the same emergency room.
While we were driving, the pain in my arm became worse. The fingers on my left hand were numb. Carol let me out at the ER and I told the triage nurse about my symptoms. She got a wheelchair and said, I'm going to call this as a possible stroke.
A doctor greeted me and decided it wasn't a stroke after he asked me to push on his hands and I nearly knocked him down. Tests determined I did not have a heart attack. Dr. said I was having muscle spasms that caused the pain and prescribed muscle relaxers. Everyone treated me with such kindness.
Carol took me home. She and the very nice lady who lives across the street have gotten me groceries and picked up prescriptions. The muscle relaxers are helping more than the painkillers did.
I fear the future. The attacker is charged with a felony. I doubt if he'll get much jail/prison time. I'll get a restraining order. It won't stop him. Hospital bills will pour in. Insurance only covers so much. I fear being ruined financially. I fear being murdered.
That's as much as I feel up to writing for now.
Infinities of love,