Thursday, September 26, 2013


Gentle Readers . . . and Maxwell,

Today I present for your viewing consideration a so-called comedy known as The Big Wedding (2013, Rated R, Available on DVD).

Ellie (Diane Keaton) returns to the home where she once lived with her husband, Don (Robert De Niro). Ellie and Don divorced because Don had an affair with Ellie's best friend, Bebe (Susan Sarandon). Now the family is coming together because one of Don and Ellie's three children, Alejandro, is getting married. The couple adopted Alejandro from Columbia. His biological mother also is coming to the wedding. Because the biological mother is a staunch Catholic, Alejandro asks Don and Ellie to pretend that they are still married. Antics ensue.

Could this plot be more contrived and stupid? Why, yes, it could, you'd say, if you knew all the details of the movie. Ellie and Don's two older children are played by Topher Grace and Katherine Heigl. Grace's character is a 30-year-old virgin. Most of the "jokes" in the movie have to do with sex and are not funny. Heigl's character spends the entire movie looking disgusted. I wonder why.

The movie also has some very bad and stupid physical comedy, such as Don being afraid of heights and falling off a diving board into a pool when Ellie tells him they have to pretend to be married.

The big question here is as follows: What are Diane Keaton, Robert De Niro, and Susan Sarandon doing in this dreck? Do they need money that badly? 

The movie, however, seems perfect for Heigl, who hasn't been in anything funny or good since Knocked Up. Oh, wait a minute. She was in that movie in which she and a guy she hates fall in love while they're raising their deceased friends' child. I can't remember the name of it, but it wasn't as bad as some of the other crap in which I've seen her. 

Willy Dunne Wooters saw only a few minutes of The Big Wedding and said he's tired of comedies that revolve around lies. Willy Dunne Wooters knows of what he speaks.

Hey, there. I'm Willy Dunne Wooters.
Don't bother to lust after me, ladies.
I belong to Miss Junebug.
This movie's rating should be "Seal Broken, Do Not View."

Thank you for your input, Willy Dunne Wooters. The Big Wedding earns The Janie Junebug Seal of Malaise or Ennui. Take your pick, but who cares?

Watch at your own risk. And it's not for kids unless you want them to ask you in front of your mother-in-law what cunnilingus is.

You can find something better to watch. I just know it. Look back through some of my other reviews for a good one you haven't seen yet, or watch something you've seen before and you love it so much that it's worth watching again.

Infinities of love,

Janie Junebug


  1. That guy plays a great role in the Crazy Stupid Love.
    I'll watch The Big Wedding, it sounds like a hoot.

  2. I hope you like it. I didn't think it was funny at all, and "that guy" from Crazy Stupid Love just happens to bear a strong resemblance to my new boyfriend, Willy Dunne Wooters.

  3. Thanks for the tip--watching it is now on my list of things not to do this weekend!!

    1. I don't think you'd like it at all, so that's good.

  4. You don't know what a cunning linguist is?

    I even see Robin Williams in there. He's almost the funniest man on the planet and even he didn't help, huh? I'll definitely avoid this one. Like I have time for unfunny dreck anyway.


    1. Robin Williams plays a small part as a priest who's counseling the couple about to get married. For once in his life and mine, Robin Williams made no impression on me.

  5. This is the first I've heard about this movie. I need to get out more :)

    1. You can know everything about the world from your home computer. Never leave the house again.

  6. Would you believe we have good friends who thought this was one of the best movies---ever?

  7. So glad you told me about this movie. It is off my Netflix list. I've been so disappointed in most of the comedies these days. The cheap jokes are about sex, drugs, drinking, and/or bodily functions like pooping and farting. (Sadly, it's the same with most of the TV comedies, too.) I think it is probably easy money for the actors. ;)

  8. Replies
    1. That sums it up nicely. Unless you're talking about me.


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