Hello. It is I, Penelope. I know Mom Mom has been telling you stories about adopting my big little sister, Princess, but I must ask you a question.
Sometimes Mom Mom sprinkles some grass seed in the backyard and sometimes I might accidentally lick some of the grass seed. Mom Mom said, Penelope, stop eating grass seed.
I don't eat grass seed, I told her.
Look in a mirror, she said. You have grass seed on your lower lip.
A little while later I accidentally got more grass seed on my lips and she said, Penelope, if you keep eating grass seed, you are going to turn into a chia pet.
Is this true? Could I turn into a chia pet? Sometimes Mom Mom makes up stuff, but sometimes she is right.
If I turned into a chia pet, would I still look like myself, or would I look like the Bob Ross chia pet? Or maybe I would grow some different grass and look like the Willie Nelson chia pet?
I really don't want to be Willie Nelson or Bob Ross. I want to be I, Penelope. I hope I don't turn into a chia pet, but if I do, then I will be the cutest chia pet ever!
That is all. Goodbye.