Gentle Readers . . . and Maxwell,
Did any of you watch the Obama-Romney debate on Wednesday night?
You did, yes, and you. I see a decent number of hands so you must be paying attention.
Dr. X -- I love you. I want to stay married to you forever.
Moi -- I'm so glad.
Dr. X -- I want a divorce.
Moi -- What?
Dr. X -- I didn't say anything.
Moi -- What?
Dr. X -- What's wrong with you?
Moi -- You just said you want a divorce.
Dr. X -- No, I didn't. You have borderline personality disorder and I can see when you go into an altered state. Your eyes get darker.
Moi -- I have never been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. You have a major case of crazy. How can you say that you want a divorce when you just said you want to stay married forever?
Dr. X -- I did not say I want a divorce. You are crazy. I'm going to see to it that you're locked up in a mental institution for the rest of your life.
Moi -- You're crazy. You should have been hospitalized a long time ago. You need to take your meds.
Dr. X -- I don't need meds. You're crazy.
Moi -- I am not. It's you. You're the one who's crazy.
Dr. X -- You're crazy. I'm not crazy.
Moi -- You're crazy. I'm not crazy.
Blah, blah, blah. And Jim Lehrer wasn't even there to make little grunty noises when we exceeded our time limits and didn't stick to the point.
I'd like to see true debates between the candidates. I was a better debater as a high school student. At least I knew I couldn't have extra time by saying "I want to make one more point." And I knew I had to remain focused and stick to the subject. High school debates also tended to be considerably more lively.
C'mon, Candidates. You can do better, and you should.
Infinities of love,