Wednesday, October 17, 2012

MENTAL PAWS

Hi Everybody! Mom is letting me blog today. Yeah, me. Franklin. I'm wagging my tail at you and kissing the screen in front of me. Can you feel my kisses? I know I slobber some.

I get to do the blog because Mom doesn't feel good. She says it's mental paws. I dunno what that means, but I hope it goes away soon.

Mom is the bitch in our dog pack (I learned from Samson that that's the word for girl dogs). We're all boys except for Mom.

Besides me, there's Scout:



And Harper, who is my best friend:

I'm telling Harper a secret in this picture.

And, of course, we have Mom:

We love Mom a whole bunch. She has thumbs and can do stuff we can't do. 

But the problem is that lately she's grouchy. Last week we were getting ready to go for a walk. I was excited like always when she got the lead out of the closet. I started wiggling around and wagging my whole butt really hard. My butt was just following my tail.

Mom got mad and stomped her foot on the floor and yelled at me: Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!

Like I didn't hear her the first time.

I was so scared I peed a little bit. Mom never yells at us.

I think it must be the mental paws. Mom said she was sorry, but we want the mental paws to go away. And fast! As fast as Harper runs when he catches a bird.

I'm tired now so I guess I'll take a nap.


Thanks for reading my new blog! Oh. Mom says it's still hers. She's kind of a selfish bitch.

Bye Samson! Bye Gracie! Bye Alex's chihuahuas! Bye Beau!

I hope I didn't forget anybuddy.

Love and kisses,

Frankie Big Paws

18 comments:

  1. That was so cute, Franklin! You are a handsome guy :) And your brothers are, too!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gosh, thanks. I bet you're cute.

      Love,
      Franklin

      Delete
  2. Hey Frankie, this is Max, one of Alex's chis. Actually I am her favorite even if I constantly pee on myself, she calls me pissy pants. I totally hear ya on the mental paws stuff, cause I think my mom has it too. THe other day she bought me a 'costume' for Halloween, it's a prisoner jumpsuit and it says "BAD- DOG" on the back. NOw I have to wear it so she can laugh at me. SHe tried to put it on my brother, Peanut, but he's so fat he almost torn it in two. MOnica, my sister, said she's not a bad dog, but I think she said that because she's a girl. So, now I have to wear this stuff while she snaps pictures on her phone. When will this abuse stop? Btw, maybe we should get our own blog, I bet we'd be more successful then both of our moms put together. We're so much cuter than they anyway. Well, got to go now, the crazy woman is snapping more pics, I'm going to have to call the ADLU. Take care my friend, I hear this mental paws stuff doesn't last forever.

    Your friend and fellow 4 paws
    Maximus the merciful :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Whoa, Maximus. I think you should run away and join us in Florida. Our mom doesn't make us wear costumes. That's really cruel. If she puts your picture on her blog, then that's going way too far. You'd better give your mom a little nip on the butt.

      Love,
      Fanklin

      Delete
  3. Awww. So sweet! Maybe he can give you kisses to help get rid of the mental pause. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I give Mom a kiss whenever she asks for one. I know what "kiss" means.

      Love,
      Franklin

      Delete
  4. Oh Franklin, don't worry. That bitch'll get past the Mental Paws. But right now she needs you, so be good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I try very, very hard to be the best dog in the house, Nicki.

      Love,
      Franklin

      Delete
  5. I can see getting mad at a dog for being a dog. They should learn to be like cats.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I ain't never gonna be no cat, mr. pot.

      Love,
      Franklin

      Delete
  6. Oh so sweet. I hope the mental paws goes away soon too. Lol:))
    www.thoughtsofpaps.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, PAPS! I like your name. It's almost the same as PAWS -- just one letter different. I know the whole alphabet. People don't think I can read and write, but I sure can.

      Love,
      Franklin

      Delete
  7. Franklin--your kisses got my screen all wet, but I don't care! I loved your post. Are you named after FDR? How come your mom's picture was so tiny?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The people I used to own called me Franklin after some German Shepherd they had. He died and they adopted me, but I was too rough and tough for them so I came to live with Mom. Mom's picture is so tiny because she's in the witness protection program and can't put up with thugs who might recognize her. She'd have to beat them up. It would be just like when we used to watch The Sopranos.

      Love,
      Franklin

      Delete
  8. Franklin you are cute, as well as your other dogs in your pack. I'm sorry about the mental paws; it is icky to go through but one day your mom will be smiling again and the grouchies and the hot flashes, etc will be a thing of the past. So hang in there!

    betty

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Betty! We all hope that nasty mental paws will go away soon.

      Love,
      Franklin

      Delete
  9. Sorry your mom is being strange and unpredictable and mean to you. I hope things get back to normal really soon for all of you. ;)

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  10. aww, such a cute post :)

    Franklin - you and your friends are adoreable! And I hope your mom gets better and better every day, cause she needs to write more and more amazing posts. But still, she has to let you do the job once in a while :)

    Have a nice weekend, all of you :)
    -B-

    ReplyDelete

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