Have you been here long enough to form an opinion about what you have in store for us? How many airplanes will disappear?
I suppose you can't reveal that number. I hope it's zero.
I need to make some changes. I'm not ready to tell the world what they are, but they might involve blogging a little less and writing and editing a little more. I suspect the world can survive without a dose of me every day, Monday - Friday.
I don't know why, but it seems worth mentioning that the night before last I found a lizard in the TV room. It was behind the shelves on which my office supplies are organized. It was an unusually bright green lizard. I tried to stab it with some scissors that were at hand because, as I said, we met behind the office supplies, and office supplies include scissors.
You bastard, you ran away every time I came at you with the scissors. How did you know they would kill you if they had the chance? What other experiences have you had with scissors?
I told Willy Dunne Wooters that you visited, but I didn't tell him about the attempted murder. He thinks I should scoop up the likes of you and set you free outside. I don't know why. So many of your ilk are already running around. He seemed quite shocked that I sometimes stab your species with a fork, or whatever else I can grab, such as scissors.
You got away, so Willy Dunne Wooters will be better off if he doesn't know what I tried to do to you. Is there a lesson in your escape? Am I better off not knowing what 2015 will bring?
You won't be nothing but another year with a 5 instead of a 4 at your end, will you?
If I make changes, you can still count on me to be Your Queen of Grammar.
Infinities of love,
Janie Junebug
I'm with WDW, you should first attempt capture, then stabbing should all else fail. Lizards eat insects, the true enemy. Killing a lizard first thing in 2015 would have been bad ju-ju. Here's wishing you and yours a happy, healthy New Year.
ReplyDeleteI'm very surprised you tried to do something as gory as stab a living thing to death with scissors :P
ReplyDeleteIt's déjà vu all over again, Janie Junebug. Last year at this time you and I were just becoming acquainted, sniffing each other like a couple of dogs, making sure we would be compatible playmates. Think of all we have shared in the past year (including those 8-by-10 glossies). It's great to have you in my world.
ReplyDeleteI am a lot like WDW. I believe it's good karma to capture a creature that you find in your house and set it free instead of stabbing or squashing it. That lizard might have been a reincarnation of your great aunt Bertha paying you a visit from beyond. Of course, if you hated your great aunt Bertha, then it makes perfect sense that you'd go after her with scissors.
Happy Monday, dear friend Janie!
That lizard had some nerve, not letting itself be stabbed by your scissors. Sheesh!
ReplyDeleteYou are now and forever my Queen of Grammar - oh, please fix me!
ReplyDeleteThis is a resolution of sorts expressed in your post. Just because you don't call it a resolution doesn't mean it's not a resolution. I resolve to refer to this as one.
I resolve to be a little more serious for 2015.
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of lizards, I found one in my pa...oops, failed already.
I always get lizards in the house. Hate them. Going to look for the scissors now! Happy New Year!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Willy Dunne Wooters. There was a lizard type critter in the upstairs extra room in Illinois. I was amazed.
ReplyDeleteI hope you don't disappear complete;y. I need my grammar queen.
ReplyDeleteLess blogging is definitely good, especially if you want to focus on writing. We used to post every day. Then every other day. Then twice a week. Now even once a week is a struggle. As we like to think (or try to justify it), it's not laziness if you're working on something else.
ReplyDeleteMy son got a lizard for his birthday. I was creeped out at first, but he's growing on me. I still don't want to hold him, though I probably wouldn't go stab route, but I might try a show box scoop and release attempt.
ReplyDeleteIf I ever visit you, I will be sure NOT to wear green!!
ReplyDeleteHappy New Year! May 2015 only have good things in store for you. Lizards freak me out so I just get my brother to deal with them for me. If he isn't there I scream like the girl I am and get my mom. Nothing like a lizard to make me feel like a kid again.
ReplyDeleteAw, no stabbing lizards!! They're cute. Plus, if you had killed him, his little lizard family would have been wondering what happened to daddy and why didn't he come home?! Willy and I would get along just fine. Maybe I'll send my dog to you, though, because he LOVES killing critters of every kind. We have a morality conflict in my house.
ReplyDeleteSo far 2015 feels just like 2014, only colder.
Lizard one, Janie zero ~ hope he makes it out of your house before he encounters you again. Happy New Year, Janie and please scoop the thing up next time.
ReplyDeleteI can almost visualize you chasing the lizard while wildly stabbing at him. If you tell WDW, it might be pretty scary for him.
ReplyDeleteI need to write a blog about my dear friend who has a theory about the outcome of even years and odd years. Recently she said in regard to a series of events, "Well, it's an odd decade!" "Odd decade? How do you get that?" "I'm in my fifties!."
ReplyDeleteAh, youth.
I fear any critter that lives outside and decides to venture into the house. Growing up, we had a raccoon and then a bird come into the house. Both freaked me out but it was my mother, and her trusty broom, that managed to get both back into the wild. I don't know if I could stab something then again, I've never had a lizard in my house. LOL never say never. :) Whatever changes you make, I hope they are for your own personal benefit. I'm sure I speak for many when I say: I'll still be here. Do what you need to do, friend. xx
ReplyDeleteI can't help it..I must look up Lizards I my animal totem guide by Ted Andrews. It is based on native teachings and what the animal is trying to teach you. So what does it mean...Pay attention to your intuition. Listen to what you see even if others don't. you might need to distance yourself from something, take a step back so you do not get swallowed up by what is negative around you. Listen to your dreams. I say try to capture it and free it, don't kill the poor thing:) Sounds like the green colour is really pretty
ReplyDeleteHumans are interesting creatures, as we contemplate what will improve our lives. We have a list of needs and beyond that we have a list of wants. If and when you catch that lizard, you might want to ask to see it's list. I'd go so far as to guess it has no interest in 2015 any more than say,1855. I'm also guessing it doesn't sit in the sun on a warm windowsill contemplating being seen more or less. And I'm absolutely sure grammar is not even a concept within it's tiny brain.
ReplyDeleteI hope 2015 is kind to you. You have focus, attitude, and are looking at actions you want and need to make that one life more enjoyable, (and other attributes, as you may choose, for yourself). That's commendable, and also expected. Hooray Janie!
Oh, and about the scissors. He's can feel the air coming downward and know something is coming towards him. That's why fly swatters have holes in them. So the flies cannot feel the down draft of air. Use a fly swatter, stun him with a smack, then take him outside.(smile)
Maybe you should practice stabbing while you jump back and forth. Better luck next time.
ReplyDeletePretty sure I'd be too chicken to attack the lizard...I would need a very large something or other to try to catch one in.!
ReplyDeleteI would have completely freaked.
ReplyDelete-andi