MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE?

Excuse me, Gentle Readers, and for once, it's not because I farted.

I want to talk to you, you, you over there on the left, you wearing the bikini and you really should have waxed, and all of Slovenia: I'm taking a brief vacay from the blog. I won't be gone long. I promise. I know Slovenia depends on me for their entertainment.

I need to spend time improving my invitation to William and Harry. I took the informal approach with the first draft, thinking it would get their attention, but I don't know if it's such a good idea. I need to ponder, meditate, and all that, before I decide on the perfect invitation to the royal cousins. NO, they aren't cousins, dumb ass. They're brothers. If you read my blog you'd know they are my kids' cousins.

While I'm gone, please consider giving some earlier posts of mine a chance. You might try

HICCUPS AND WATERBOARDING

I SAW MY DAD EMBARRASSED - ONCE

CHARLOTTE A. MARTIN: THIS JOURNEY . . . I BELIEVE

MR. ROGERS DID NOT WEAR A SWEATER TO COVER UP HIS 

ME 'N MY GEE PEE ESS

AND SUMMER WILL NOT COME AGAIN

HELLO - IS IT ME YOU'RE LOOKING FOR?


By the by, I watched Barney's Version, relatively new to DVD. Watch it; don't watch it. It's up to you. I'm tired of Paul Giamatti's hangdog look. However, Minnie Driver is a revelation in hilarity as -- dare I say it? -- a JAP. Being a LAP myself (Lutheran American Princess), I'm wary of these stereotypes.

Infinities of love and independence,

Lola

P.S. My Dear Mrs. Tuna, Please do not read "And Summer Will Not Come Again." The dog died. It happens every fucking time.