DANKE, MEIN LIEB

Gentle Readers . . . and Maxwell,

Several weeks ago, my beloved Nicki Elson (author of Three Daves and Divine Temptation) at Nicki Elson's Not-So-Deep Thoughts gave me The Liebster Award. What with this, that, and the other thing – such as getting my car stuck in the mud – I haven't yet accepted this kindness. So, today, Yes, Nicki Elson, I accept your challenge.

I believe I've received this award before, and a few people have given it to me but I didn't accept because I had too much going on and I had run out of lies facts about myself. I don't want anyone to think I'm playing favorites. If I didn't accept the Liebster from you, then it wasn't because it came from you. I was just plain too unimaginative at that moment to think of crap to say about me.

The rules for this award are as follows:

This award is given to bloggers by bloggers and gives glimpses into our lives. We give 11 fun facts about ourselves, answer 11 questions, pass the award on to 11 bloggers and then ask 11 new questions. 

Here are my fun lies facts:

1. Elisa, at The Crazy Life of a Writing Mom, is my middle child, as you already know. What you don't know is that she had an identical twin sister I gave up for adoption because I liked Elisa better. She was easier to pop out.
2. I'm a real bitch extremely effective at complaining and often get businesses/stores to do what they should have done in the first place without a complaint.
3. A man I've known less than a week is sitting next to me, right now, wearing nothing but a pair of short shorts. He is asleep and sawing logs.
4. I am a gymnast and was on the Olympic team during whatever year it was that President Carter decided to boycott the Olympics. 
5. I was favored to win 19 gold medals at the Olympics.
6. I was an award winning debater in high school.
7. I married Dr. X to make my mom shut up.
8. I can't remember our wedding. I know I arrived at the church. I know who the best man, matron of honor, and groom were, but the ceremony is a blank. I think I was the bride.
9. I've been in rehab for sexual addiction more than once. 
10. The rehab never works. I always return to my addiction as fast as I fricking can.
11. Kianwi at simply she goes is my mom, but not the one who needed to shut up so I married Dr. X. The mom who needed to shut up adopted me. Kianwi gave me up because she hadn't yet left the convent. 

All righty, then. Now I have to answer Nicki Elson's questions:

1. Les Mis or Sweeney Todd?

I've never seen either one performed live, so I'm choosing between the movies. The obvious answer is Sweeney Todd because my lover, Johnny Depp, is THE STAR.

2. If you were a comic book superhero, what wold your name be?

Janie Juneboobs

3. What are the toppings on your dream hamburger?

Lettuce and tomato, and you'd damn well better not bring me a pickle

4. What city (that you've never visited) do you most want to visit?

London

5. Favorite city (that you have visited).

San Francisco

6. Which Disney character is most like you?

Sleeping Beauty

7. Why? (in follow up to question 6)

I'm tired.

8. You can only choose one: would you rather write a book that's a best seller or a book that's highly acclaimed?

Highly acclaimed – duh

9. What's your biggest pet peeve when it comes to grammatical mistakes in a published book?

I refuses to anser such a silly kwestion becuz grammar don't matter.

10. If you could live permanently in any decade, which would it be?

Can't answer on the grounds it may incriminate me

11. Who's your favorite fictional romantic couple?

Fitzwilliam and Elizabeth

Now I'm to give the award to 11 other bloggers. If you see that I've given the award to you, then please say so in a comment so I don't have to contact you to tell you about it because I'm really too lazy to contact you but will feel guilty when I don't. Baby needs a new pair of shoes! Give me 11:

1. http://desertcanyonliving.blogspot.com/  INGER
2. http://www.youngmanbrown.com/ WHAT'S HIS NAME
3. http://www.haleyscomic.com/ HALEY
4. http://susan-swiderski.blogspot.com/ SUSAN FLETT SWIDERSKAROOSKY
5. http://shellysm.blogspot.com/ SHELLY
6. http://remoteappeal.blogspot.com/ LOONYSUSE
7. http://my2ndcup.blogspot.com/  COFFEE LADY
8. http://spotsandwrinkles.blogspot.com/ MARSHA
9. http://thebluegrumpster.blogspot.com/ THAT LITTLE BLUE GUY WHO CLAIMS HE'S GRUMPY BUT HE'S NOT
10. http://tonyvanhelsing.blogspot.com/  TONY VAN HELSING
11. http://littlelottajoy.blogspot.com/  LITTLE LOTTA JOY

And last, but certainly not least, I must ask 11 questions to be answered by the bloggers I've nominated if they get around to accepting the award:

1. Who is Elisa's twin sister?
2. Are any of the fun facts about me true?
3. If any of them are true, then which ones are true?
4. Do I snore?
5. How many siblings do I have?
6. How many sisters do I have?
7. How many of my sisters are bitches?
8. How many dogs do I have? How many of my dogs are bitches?
9. Where am I going on vacation this summer?
10. Am I beautiful, gorgeous, or very, very pretty?
11. Do I love Coffeypot?

If I nominated you for the award and you accept it, then please link back to me in your post.

Infinities of love,

Janie Junebug