Hi everybuddy. It's Franklin. I'm sorry, but I'm not my usual tail wagging happy self.
You won't believe what Mom did to me.
Just try to guess.
She took me to the booty shop.
She said I was dirty and I smelled like a dog. Well, I AM a dog. Does she think I'm gonna smell like a cat? Oh, man, that would be so gross.
The lady at the booty shop is nice. I've been there before. Her name is Candace and she tells me how sweet and bootiful I am.
But, the indignitaries I suffer when I'm there. First, Candace gives me a bath. I get wet and cold. But then she uses a big blow dryer to get the wet out of my fur, and she brushes me. Just when the bristles of the brush start to feel good and I think I might fall asleep, that's when the worst part happens.
Candace shaves the, the, I don't know if I can say it, I think I'm gonna cry, but I have to tell you everybuddy: Candace shaves the fur on MY BUTT!
Mom says the fur on my butt gets longer than the rest of my fur and little leaves and sticks and even some little bits of somebuddy's poop get stuck in it. It's embarrassing, but it's even more embarrassing when Candace makes me stand on a table in front of all the other dogs and I have to stick my butt up in the air and they all stare and I know they're laughing at me.
I was so glad when Mom came back to get me. But can you believe she actually pays Candace to do that to me? Mom could be using that money to buy chew toys and treats.
I say no more booty shop.
I wanna stay home every day and play with my brother Harper.
Thanks for listening to my troubles. Don't tell Mom I said so, but I still love her.
And I love you, everybuddy.