PENELOPE SPEAKS: THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT KISSMAS OF MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE

 Merry Kissmas! I knew you would visit me today because Santa Paws comes tonight!

When I wear my Santa Paws sweater, I carry Santa with me everywhere I go.

But now I have something new to wear because Santa let me have one gift early. You won't believe what it is!

It's a new hoodie! I am so excited.

Mom Mom said Santa gave me this beautiful garment because it is very, very cold here. Santa is worried about me. 

I love you, Santa Paws.

But I think something even more important has happened. Santa Paws is using this gift to send me a sign.

Santa knows that this hoodie is the costume for a character in my favorite movie, the one about the little reindeer who can fly. 

Every time I watch this movie, I cry when the other reindeer pick on Rudolph and won't let him play reindeer games. I cry for him because I know how he feels. You know that I am a poor, sad abused little doggy. Mom Mom ruined the secret passage to France and Mom Mom neglects me because of the stupid work thing. And she's always cackling with that Rubekkkkuh.

But then I am so happy when Santa asks Rudolph to help him deliver presents to all the good children and good doggies. When Santa and Rudolph and the other reindeer fly off I know they are bringing presents to me. 

I also cry when Rudolph visits The Island of Misfit Toys. The toys are so sad because no one wants them. I am crying now just thinking about it. Aaaaaaaaaaaa waaaaaaaaaaah  It is so sad. Waaaaaaaaah Waaaaaaaaaah

No one should be unwanted. It gets better again when my friend Santa goes to get the toys so children can have them again. I am dressed as the pink polka-dotted elephant.

I am sure Santa brought me this beautiful costume because it's his way of letting me know that I will star as the elephant toy in a sequel to the movie, or maybe a reboot of the original, the best movie ever. I am so excited. When I get the call telling me I have the starring role, I will be ready. Maybe the movie will even be made in France! And I will bark in French!

I can't wait. When I know I am the star, I will tell Mom Mom how foolish she was when she ruined my journey to France, and I will not take her there with me. Poor, stupid Mom Mom. Everyone will admire me and applaud me and I will walk on a red carpet and not even pee on it. Just you wait and see.

So now I say to you my loyal fans, Merry Kissmas and I am coming soon to a theater near you.