Gentle Readers . . . and Maxwell,
The song for my most recent Battle of the Bands was Hozier's Take Me To Church (click HERE to read the original post). When I announced the winner--Hozier, of course--I mentioned that my favorite lines in the song are
My lover has a sense of humor.
She's the giggle at a funeral.
What a great use of words. She's doesn't giggle at a funeral. She's not the giggler at a funeral. She IS the giggle.
That metaphor really gets to me. I want to be the giggle at a funeral. It's not something I can explain. I think you understand it, or you don't.
I have attended two funerals: my dad's, and several years later, my mother's. I can't remember going to any other funerals. My brother died quite some time ago. I didn't go to the funeral. I couldn't leave town, I couldn't afford to go. I didn't know him very well. Choose the excuse you prefer.
Is it weird that I'm fifty-six years old, and I've only been to two funerals? Now that I think about it, maybe I can keep up my no funeral attendance streak. Oh, damn. I remember another funeral I attended, but I barely knew the guy. It was a long time ago. I don't think it counts.
Most of you probably don't read my responses to comments, so you wouldn't have seen these on my blog:
Oh, how we laughed after my dad's funeral. The pastor gave the most awful . . . eulogy? Except it wasn't a eulogy. He barely mentioned my dad. He spoke about a serial killer who found Christ before he was executed. My oldest nephew said he was pretty sure he'd seen the story in Reader's Digest. During the "eulogy," we stared in shock. Afterwards, we couldn't quit laughing. When my dad's ashes were buried, one of my sisters put her face to the opening in the ground to shout at the serial killer and ask if he was down there. My mom looked at the very sober young man from the funeral home and said, I raised a bunch of nuts.
When my mom died, we couldn't quit laughing during her funeral. The pastor had asked us about special memories we had of our mom. We brought up frizzy home perms and wearing ugly matching dresses that my mom sewed. Oh, how we laughed.
I want so badly to be the giggle at a funeral. I'm not sure how to go about it if I don't go to funerals. Maybe if I'm the giggle all the time, then I can be considered the giggle at the funeral. Yeah. I want to be the giggle as often as possible.
I have a new goal. I like it.
The dishwasher was repaired, but other stuff broke. The heating and AC guy needs to visit me.
I continue to edit. I'm grateful for the work.
I'll see you Friday, October 30th, for The Cephalopod Coffeehouse. Sign up for this bookish bloghop with The Armchair Squid. I'll be here again on Sunday, November 1st, for The Battle of the Bands. This time I'll be ready and not pull a battle out of my ass at the last minute.
Sing us out please, Billie Joe.
Infinities of love,
Janie Junebug
My motto as an editor: Authors are the authority on their work. I'm a full-service editor. For a reasonable fee, I'm your writing coach from the first suggested revision to the correction of the final typo.
How strange... I was discussing it with a coworker about two weeks ago. I've been to so many funerals that I've lost count. Every time I said how many, I realized I was forgetting one. She's the same but with weddings. I've never been to a wedding and she's never been to a funeral. I think people generally have a lot of one or the other, but maybe not both.
ReplyDeleteI've been to maybe six weddings. That's not a lot for someone my age. I guess it doesn't matter.
DeleteYou're a giggle on the internet--why not at a funeral?
ReplyDeleteNo, I don't want to be A giggle. I want to be THE giggle. I need to drink my chocolate milk and go to bed.
DeleteI don't like to go to funerals because i will get frightened of them. Mostly i avoid going for it...
ReplyDeleteI usually don't know that someone has died until after the funeral. I'm always the last to know everything.
DeleteWe were fortunate when Dad died. My 1 1/2 year old granddaughter not only was The Giggle at the funeral. The church was packed and the family was about to walk into the service when she pooped, a huge, take notice poop, at that! My middle son said "Pop would love this" and we all started laughing. I am sure it looked disrespectful to anyone looking at us, but it was the perfect nod to my dad's sense of humor.
ReplyDeleteThat's great. Who doesn't love a pooping baby?
DeleteI avoid funerals. I just don't like them. I wish I could giggle at my dad's funeral. It was too sad. But your new goal sounds very obtainable. All the best with your editing.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Murees. How's it going with The Amaranthine? My dad's funeral wasn't all that sad. We were ready to go in there and get it done. The room was packed. It was standing room only because he was so loved. The moving part was the bugler playing Taps. The American flag from the casket was folded by men from the military. Then it was presented to my mom.
DeleteI think that means you need to be able to find the humor in any situation, then, when things are dire or at their lowest, someone just looks at you and giggles, boom, you're the giggle at a funeral. If you can generate a laugh even at inappropriate times, you are a bringer of joy, a giggle at a funeral. Me? I want to be the guffaw at a drug deal. Or the chortle at a government deposition. Or the sneeze-fart at a euthanasia.
ReplyDeleteThe worse things are, the more my son and I can usually find to laugh about.
DeleteThe sneeze-fart?
DeleteHmmmm is it weird that you're fifty-six years old, and you've only been to two funerals? Not if, like me, you hate funerals. They creep me out. When I was 8 and I saw my grandpa in a coffin, I was damaged for the rest of my life, so no.... I don't think it's weird.
DeleteBeing the giggle is a good thing, Janie.
Yeah, Pickleope. The sneeze fart?
DeleteIt's easy not to go to funerals. People rarely die when I'm around. When I worked at the nursing home, I only had one patient who died. It was a peaceful death.
DeleteHi, dear Janie! My aunt died over the weekend at age 95. Last evening I exchanged a number of emails with my cousin, her daughter. After the initial condolences we found ourselves recalling funny moments and funny things my aunt said over the years. It feels good to laugh and there is no shame in it.
ReplyDeleteYou wrote:
<< This time I'll be ready and not pull a battle out of my ass at the last minute. >>
That made me giggle.
My condolences, beloved Shady, but keep up the giggling. I had a margarita last night. When we got home, I sang Bali Hai from South Pacific. Willy Dunne Wooters laughed because Franklin's ears went up, and he looked as if he couldn't believe that noise came out of Mom.
DeleteGo forth, giggle, and be the giggle!
ReplyDeleteI pledge that I shall be the giggle forevermore. Join me!
DeleteYou made me giggle.
ReplyDeleteYeah, like a little girl, boyfren.
DeleteJust the sound of the word makes me smile. Remember those days as pre-teens when you and a girlfriend (or just you by yourself) would get the giggles over something and could not stop no matter what? Go for it!
ReplyDeleteI've always been one to get the giggles at about two or three in the morning. Sometimes on trips we'd drive all night. My ex-husband and I often got the giggles very early in the morning. Marriage wasn't all bad.
DeleteMy favourite line from that song is "I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies." I think we've all been there, haven't we? In one way or another. Sorry, that's not much of a giggle at a funeral.
ReplyDeleteYou're right: It's a great line. The song is beautifully written. I wouldn't change anything about it.
DeleteLots of funny things can happen at funerals. My sister-in-law told me that they just about died laughing at her Dad's funeral when one of her sisters almost fell into the grave. THAT's funny! I remember going to Molly Ivins funeral (syndicated newspaper columnist) and she was so funny in life that people were getting up and telling Molly-stories and had the crowd absolutely roaring! It was the most fun I've ever had at a funeral. So you go and be the giggle at a funeral. People will love you for it!
ReplyDeleteMichele at Angels Bark
It's better than being the sobber who hugs everyone, and no one wants to hug the sobber and be soaked in tears and snot.
DeleteOh I hope people have one hell of a party and recall all the times I fell asleep with friends placing things on top of my head or my time when I was thrown into a fountain or when i hitchhiked with Santa. I have been to so many funerals that I can't quite recall how many. Some were quite a bit of fun and some were downright strange. I recall , when I was a little kid, This friend of the family passed away. he had an affair on his wife( more than one) but when his wife came in she was wearing a cape with red velvet underneath. She swooped in crying, went to the casket took out a comb and combed his hair! I looked up at my dad in bewilderment and he just said that we would talk later.
ReplyDeleteI love that. We'll talk later. I hope that man had a lot of life insurance so he left a rich widow. One of my favorite movie lines is in Moonstruck when Loretta says that she'll come to Johnny's funeral in a red dress.
DeleteGiggling at a funeral is like spitting in the eye of death. Giggling at the great events of the life of the person gone is spitting in the eye of death.
ReplyDeleteI spit in the eye of death. The Wooters man is afraid of death. I told him he has nothing to worry about because when I die I'll grab his hand and take him to heaven with me.
DeleteIf people start laughing around me I to burst out laughing. The same goes for crying.
ReplyDeleteI'm only going to a service, not a funeral this week. My Mom's cousin that just past away is having a funeral 3 hours away. There is a service here because she lived here her whole adult life.
At my Great Grandma's funeral I sore her eyes opened on me. I was freaked out! I also thought it was really odd that a guy dressed in a uniform was sobbing. I never saw him in my life. I found out he was crying because he used to steal peaches from her tree. She kept asking who was stealing peaches from her tree? He never confessed. He married into the family. He kept silent all those years. It's odd how something so small can set someone off.
I've been to a handful of other funerals.
Peaches. Interesting.
DeleteLove,
Janie
I would love to be the giggle at her funeral, I don't want people crying unless they are tears of laughter, I'm a funny woman, ok I'm not but I can tell myself I am, although the serial killer story that was strange, my daughter has a fascination with serial killers but I would think it strange topic of a eulogy just saying
ReplyDeleteI think you have a great sense of humor. That pastor probably didn't know what to say, so he talked about the serial killer who, before he was executed, learned to believe in God. I doubt if it was a true story.
DeleteI've been to under ten. No gigglers. A lot of sobbing.
ReplyDeleteI've been to about thirty weddings, but that streak ended about ten years ago.
That's a lot of weddings. Family? Friends? Both? Either? At my mother's funeral, after we laughed so hard, then we cried for a while.
DeleteI'm sixty-three and I've probably been to half a dozen funerals.
ReplyDeleteThat's not bad.
DeleteYou're the same age as Willy Dunne Wooters. I'm a mere slip of a girl.
DeleteAnd now I have a new goal too, Junie. Plus, I want everyone else to be the giggle at my funeral/memorial. Sure, miss me too. But laugh and keep laughing in my memory.
ReplyDeleteI promise to be the giggle when you go.
DeleteLoved this, Janie. The giggle at a funeral—I also love that line from Take Me To Church, and you're right, it's the worthiest of goals to have, the best guideline for a life well lived. (And who cares about the funerals? Be the giggle wherever you are!
ReplyDeleteGuilie @ Quiet Laughter
Yes! Always be the giggle, and you bring joy to the world.
DeleteI've been to a lot of funerals. I do not like them. I want to be a giggle and a funeral. Maybe you and I can go be giggles together.
ReplyDeleteI would love to be the giggle with you.
DeleteThat is an interesting line. Hmm...I need to think about that. I've been to three funerals at age forty-three. I missed my grandmothers--who was like a mom to me because I had just been visiting and she died right after. I would have had to turn around and drive six hours back. But I know she would have said, "No, don't come. There's nothing to see here." There's the giggle.
ReplyDeleteShe knew she wasn't there anymore. She'd moved on.
DeleteOkay, so there's a British sitcom you need to watch: Coupling. It's the series that made Stephen Moffat a BBC star before Dr. Who and Sherlock. It's relevant here because of an episode called Sex, Death & Nudity in which The Giggle Loop is discussed. Trust me. You'll thank me afterwards.
ReplyDeleteSide note: avoid the US version of the series. It is unspeakably horrible.
Thank you for the suggestion, Mr. Squid. I shall look for the show. I hope it's on Netflix or Amazon Prime.
DeleteJanie, to be the "giggle" at a funeral is nice. I mean, I'd rather celebrate someone's life, instead of mourning the loss. I hope everyone is smiling or laughing when I pass. I think I'll have someone to post a sign that reads, "No long faces allowed!" Thanks for making me smile. Oh yeah, glad to hear your dishwasher is fixed and sorry to hear other things are broke. That's life for you!
ReplyDeleteThe dishwasher broke again today. HA! That'll teach me to say something has been fixed.
DeleteI love that line as well. I always see it as someone who brings joy in a bad time, but with a little twist of weird.
ReplyDeleteGlad things are looking good for you.
We are doing pretty well around here. We adopted a dog a few weeks ago, so Franklin has a new pal named Penelope.
DeleteThat is awesome.
DeleteGreat information.
ReplyDeletehttps://enetget.com/MichaelNyman