THE L WORD

Gentle Readers,

Today we celebrate the L word, and for those of you who were hoping for some girl on girl action, no, it's not lesbian.

It's LOVE! Remember - What the world needs now? What do you get when you fall in it?

I remember love. I remember my first serious love.

Yes, Gentle Readers, I will share with you, and only you, that I lost my virginity with my first serious love on this date in 19**.

We had been building up to it. I had a bit of a reputation, undeserved, for being a loose woman, easy, a slut. But I wasn't doin' it. I turned everybody down.

Until he came along.

The first time we were alone together, at night, in the dark, in a park, in my car, I felt desire like I had never felt it before. It was months before we did the deed, and the first time, even the second and third times, weren't so great.

But then - sky rockets in flight! Afternoon delight. Yeah, we did it after school.

That love and I moved on in different directions eventually. But oh, boy, do I remember him every year when Valentine's Day rolls around.

But that's enough sex - for now.

I saw "As You Like It" at the Folger in D.C. quite a few years ago. If you ever have a chance to see a play at the Folger, go, go, go!

In "As You Like It," Shakespeare takes the romantic tradition and the language of love and turns it on its head. He plays with love in his play.

Here's some more sex: In "As You Like It," wrestling is a metaphor for sex. There's an entire book, just about sex references in this play, and it's serious. It's a real critical discussion of the play.

Anyway, Orlando and Rosalind meet at a wrestling match and find themselves "overthrown" by love.

Before long, Orlando is out in the forest hanging up his bad love poetry on the trees: "From the east to western Inde, / No jewel is like Rosalinde."

Somehow Rosalind manages to keep her head in the face of these magnificent protestations. In fact, she represents a practical view of love: "Men have/ died from time to time, and worms have eaten them, but not for love."

But, Rosalind and Orlando manage to get together in the end, and presumably, they do some hot and heavy wrestling.

So whether you're a realist when it comes to love, or you're a fool for love, at least you believe the L word exists.

Don't ya remember you told me you L'ed me baby? Here in my heart I give you the best of my L. My L does it good to me. Just an old fashioned L song. L will keep us together.

Still crazy after all these years.

Love, love, love,

Dumped First Wife