Gentle Readers . . . and Maxwell,
While some people engaged in dramatic attempted assassination games to help them get their ballrooms that every president for the last 150 years has never said they wanted, I took a few minutes out of the evening to injure myself. I call it pulling a Mitchell because if you have the pleasure of following Moving With Mitchell (Mitchell is one of my favorite people in the world), then you know Mitchell tends to be a bit accident prone.
I had a small, blue-and-white china plate from England that resided on my corner cabinet in the living room for years. I heard a noise one day recently when Princess and I were in the back of the house. The plate had fallen for no discernible reason and split in two. I figured it would be easy to glue it together again.
So Saturday evening I dribbled some super strong glue on one of the broken edges and held the two pieces together as tightly as I could. Then the right side slipped and gouged my left thumb. I don't remember what I said, but it was probably rather profane.
For some reason, I was surprised to see blood.
The white stuff is glue.
It bled quite a bit and for maybe two seconds I thought I should go to the ER or Urgent Care. Then I told myself, Don't be ridiculous. You were a medical assistant. You can take care of this little thing.
I always enjoyed wound care. I grabbed a sterile dressing pad, applied pressure, and held my hand up high above my heart. The bleeding stopped pretty quickly.
The wound was clean. I rinsed off the blood with soapy water, blotted it dry, and bandaged it.
It looked like this on Sunday.
And like this on Monday.
The bruise is nasty, and the cut is still sore. I still bandage it when I leave the house.
But it's healing nicely.
I'm proud of my work.
So the next time you're injured, contact Junebug Wound Assistance. We have a 100% success rate.
If you need stitches, I'll pour some alcohol over a needle, use any color of embroidery thread you like, and get you sewn right up.
Infinities of love,
Janie Junebug
Excellent medical care! Shame about your plate, though. Did you manage to repair it satisfactorily?
ReplyDeleteNo, I decided the plate wasn't worth risking a second wound. It was time to let it go.
DeleteOuch!!!!
ReplyDeletexoxo
Yup.
DeleteYikes! That looks painful. I did not know you were a medical assistant. Kudos on that. Have a great one and heal quickly.
ReplyDeleteWorking in healthcare is one of my many talents.🤣It paid better than newspapers at a time when we needed money.
DeleteYikes! That looks like it hurt! Did you manage to save the plate nonetheless?
ReplyDeleteI looked at the plate and thought about trying again, thought a few more minutes, and tossed it in the trash.
DeleteDear friend, bless your heart!!! Ouch! I bruise quite easily and when I looked at your bruise I could feel the pain. Bless your heart! And I love this comment on your post, it made me smile.
ReplyDeleteSo the next time you're injured, contact Junebug Wound Assistance. We have a 100% success rate.
Indeed! Thank you so much for sharing, Janie.
I have always bruised easily and the bruises come even more quickly as I age. All it takes sometimes is brushing a body part against something and bam! I have a bruise. I ignore the bruises as much as possible.
DeleteI almost passed out from your picture! I am not good with injuries, or illness for that matter. I am old but still a big baby. Hope you will be completely healed soon. Sorry you had to let the pretty English dish go. I am remembering a beautiful small plate that my English mother in law gave a guest to use AS AN ASHTRAY! I almost cried.
DeleteAshtray! I'd die. Sorry the picture bothered you. The next time I injure myself I'll issue a warning about the photos.
DeleteOh my gosh, that looks like it really hurt. I think I would have not done well with it all as I hate the sight of blood, especially my own. I loved your closing "Junebug Would Assistance" offer, as it gave me a good smile to start my day!
ReplyDeleteIt hurt, but it's much better now. Blood doesn't bother me. I don't know why I was surprised to see it when I gouged myself!
DeleteWow, that was one vicious china plate! I hope you threw it in the garbage as punishment for trying to kill you.
ReplyDeleteOh, yes. It went in the garbage. It didn't deserve to be repaired even though it was the perfect shade of blue on a cream background.
DeleteThank you so much for explaining that the white stuff was glue. My mind went on a flight of revenge fantasy when I saw the photo. I will leave it at that. Try not to pull any more Mitchells. I don't think anyone else can survive those!
ReplyDeleteI don't injure myself very often, but once or twice a year something goes crazy and attacks me, like the time I was trimming a bush and the clippers flew out of my hand and landed on my foot.
DeleteI would contact Junebug Wound Assistance, but I suspect you'd arrive a bit too late to stop the bleeding... Thanks for the offer, though.
ReplyDeleteM tried to use super glue to repair a broken helicopter salt shaker. It worked fine. Too fine. Because I put it down on a bookcase, and now it's there permanently.
At least you always know where it is.
DeleteM used super glue to repair a broken helicopter salt shaker. It worked fine. Too fine. Because I put the glue down on a wooden bookcase and now it's there forever.
ReplyDeleteWell it's a good thing you didn't get the glue in the cut! Boy that was a burn. How did you ever get the glue off? I had gotten Crazy Glue on my fingers once and I actually use the nail file to get it off which worked beautifully. Of course you can only do that provide you don't have a cut or open wound. Thank heavens are all right.
ReplyDeleteThe glue came right off when I put on Neosporin. Easy peasy! My hand was also moist because I had just washed off the blood.
DeleteThat's a nasty cut and bruise! Glad you have the skills to take good care of yourself, Janie. I wish you speedy healing, ♥
ReplyDeleteThanks, Debbie. It looks better every day.
DeleteYikes! Glad you were okay and able to avoid an urgent care visit.
ReplyDeleteThe one time I had to go to urgen care they wouldn't see me without first charging me $1,000 on my credit card. I don't ever want to go there again if it can be helped.
DeleteYikes! I’m glad you’re OK and had your own skilled self there to take care of things. Is it odd that I’m flattered to be so honored? I like the sound of “pulling a Mitchell.”
ReplyDeleteYou should definitely be flattered. Your name will someday be an SAT vocabulary word.
DeleteOuch! Glad you're okay.
ReplyDeleteThanks! I'm still healing.
DeleteOUCH- Glad you got it taken care of.
ReplyDeleteLOL- I had something similar with the base of my thumb last week. I was playing 'volleyball' with the pups and the little one jumped about 3 feet in the air just as I was moving my hand up to volley the ball. Her canine tooth sunk deep into the outside lowest joint of my thumb. Washed it off, dressed it and continued on. At 2am I woke up with a throbbing hand and it was so swollen I could not bend my fingers. A trip to Urgent Care and it was cleaned again and I was given a round of antibiotics. I am on a biologic so have to be super careful of infections. Sigh...All is well-a bit bruised looking and some peeling of the skin because it was so swollen. lol. Such is life-right?! xo Diana
That was a nasty wound for you. I hope you heal well.
DeleteOuch! That looks painful!
ReplyDeleteI’m squeamish with blood, so I’d have been a mess.
Glad you handled it so well and that it’s healing.
It's easy for Junebug Wound Assistance to be on the job when I'm the one with the wound.
DeleteOuch! That is a nasty cut. Take care so it will not get infected.
ReplyDeleteI still cover it when I leave the house. Thanks for your concern.
DeleteHi Janie - it's rather a long way for me to travel - the pond is rather large ... yes the salt water would have sorted the wound out! That bruising looks horrible - glad you're ok ... all the best - Hilary
ReplyDeleteI'm afraid you'd bleed to death before you reached Junebug Wound Assistance, Hilary!
Delete